As there seems to be a demand for information and caustic commentary regarding movies which are so bad that they somehow attain a certain level of grandeur, I will employ this ongoing feature to present a selection of the odd, absurd and wacky movies created over the past century.
Goke, Body Snatcher from Hell (1968) ✪ ✪
America isn’t the only culture to produce strange sci-fi cinema. Goke, Body Snatcher from Hell belongs to the mod era of the 1960s, boasting rapturous colors, psychedelic lighting and fog effects, poor model work and a nihilistic script that foresees no future for the human race.
A jet airliner safely crash lands in Japan after a close call with a UFO. Among the passengers are a bomber and an assassin; one of them encounters the UFO and falls prey to its parasite, which turns him into a vampire. He then preys upon the rest of the passengers as they argue among themselves about what has happened and how to deal with it.
Logic is nowhere to be found in this den of paranoiacs, but at least they have reason to be paranoid. As a study of human nature under threat of death, it’s an interesting film. The ending is a knockout, seeming to reflect the tenor of the time regarding Earth’s future. In fact, it can be seen as an allegory for any number of the social ills that continue to plague us. But literally, it’s pretty silly stuff.
The X from Outer Space (1967) ✪
Another Japanese science-fiction fable is the ridiculously titled The X from Outer Space, so named in its American release even though its monster bears the name Guilala.
Japanese astronauts trying to reach Mars are intercepted by a glowing UFO that deposits a luminous substance on their spaceship. When the astronauts abort their mission and return to Earth, the substance grows from a spore into one of the silliest monsters ever seen on the screen — a gigantic antennaed, bug-eyed chicken monster with arms and claws.
Besides the folly of a guy in a silly rubber suit stomping on toy tanks defending toy cities, this monster also boasts the ability to breathe fire balls and even transport itself through the air in a glowing energy ball! But perhaps the most disappointing aspect about this film is that Guilala doesn’t appear until the second half of the movie!
The first half focuses on the astronauts and their personal feelings for one another. Much of the dialogue is ludicrous, but at least that matches the continuity and scientific goofs, such as having speeding spaceships make u-turns in space. This was the first monster movie made by Shochiku studios, Toho’s rival in Japan’s movie exhibition industry.
Assignment: Outer Space (1960) ✪ ½
This Italian space adventure was originally titled Space Men, but was changed to refer to the assignment of a news reporter to an interplanetary voyage. Although the models of spaceships are neat and their set interiors are quite interesting, the cinematic tricks employed to show them flying, landing, rotating and exploding are atrocious. During one sequence involving an explosion, a quick insertion shot of an exploding car parked behind a building is visible!
Logic is nowhere to be found, as the astronauts awaken from suspended animation in galaxy M-12 before choosing to travel to the Moon, Mars and Venus before returning to the Earth, all within a matter of hours (their time). Perhaps the hokiest aspect is when Y 13, also known as Lucy, declares her love for IZ 41, Ray the reporter, after just a few brief and colorless conversations! Actually, the acting isn’t bad, and the dubbing isn’t horrible either. But it plays more like a psychedelic dream than a cohesive movie.
MoonWolf (1959) ✪ ½
A half dog / half wolf is adopted by a doctor and later chosen to be sent on a space trip around the Moon to test conditions for future human flights. This Finnish film boasts genuine-appearing scientific equipment and testing sequences, yet the bulk of the film consists of flashbacks of how the doctor found the dog-wolf and stumbles into a romantic triangle with a woman and her boyfriend in Lapland! The “HEROIC ASTRO-DOG IN OUTER SPACE!,” as it was advertised, has a disappointingly small role in the story, heroic though he may be.
Reptilicus (1962) ✪ ½
I’ve always wanted to buy the rights to this movie and re-dub it, á la Woody Allen’s What’s Up, Tiger Lily?, because there’s never been a loonier parody-ready monster movie. A Danish production, Reptilicus grows from a cut tail section of a prehistoric beast into one of the silliest monsters imaginable. Basically a large reptile (hence its name), it cannot do much besides bite and bump into buildings, so its other chief characteristic is that it spits “acid slime” at the men hunting it through the streets of Copenhagen!
It’s production values aren’t half bad — one segment in the middle is a Copenhagen travelogue — but the special effects are atrocious. The “acid slime” effect is hilarious, as is the scene when Reptilicus eats a farmer, who at that point is quite obviously a paper cutout inserted frame by frame into the animated monster’s mouth!